I have become increasingly concerned with the tremendous increase in the area of self help and personal growth. Encouragement to embrace the 'self improvement' movement abounds in all the print and electronic media as well as on organisational fronts. As a society we are be pushed toward recycling, to lose our co-dependency, overcome our addictions, strive for financial independence in retirement and become physically fit. Cautions abound to be politically correct and refrain from offending individual or group. Men in our society are encouraged to be more sensitive and get in touch with their feelings. (My own wife beamed at me when told her I would "take it like a woman" while battling a killer cold.)
Discussion with friends confirmed that these ideas were commendable but reflected my personal concern that this overwhelming rush toward self improvement will eliminate some of the most entertaining aspects of human behaviour. The thought we may all become "behaviour clones' was voiced as was the concern that "If all our peculiarities and minor hostilities disappear our society will be reduced to a uniform shade of boring beige".
The discussion took an unusual turn When it was pointed out that a new society had been formed whose mandate it was to combat this dangerous trend toward blissful, socially concerned mediocrity. The "Socially Obnoxious and Boorish Society" or S.O.B. society's mandate is the preservation of insensitivity.
On further investigation I was able to speak with Mr. I.M Anass, the president of the society. He explained that members are encouraged to be pushy and rude, they seek out a variety of ways to vent their spleens. With uncommon graciousness he passed along a list of suggestions for potential members to explore. "If followed to their fullest, these ideas will give the interested party a feel for whether or not they wish to pursue membership".
The list of suggestions include:
1. Leave toilet seats up
2. Develop the art of foul language.
3. Use your neighbours yard as a dump for your leaves.
4. Sneer at people.
5. Borrow a VCR tape and record over it.
6. Whine
7. Snoop.
8. Talk with food in your mouth.
9. Take credit for other people's ideas.
10. Go down the up escalator.
11. Press all the buttons on the elevator.
12. Give out unlisted phone numbers.
13. Make babies cry with scary faces.
Discussion with friends confirmed that these ideas were commendable but reflected my personal concern that this overwhelming rush toward self improvement will eliminate some of the most entertaining aspects of human behaviour. The thought we may all become "behaviour clones' was voiced as was the concern that "If all our peculiarities and minor hostilities disappear our society will be reduced to a uniform shade of boring beige".
The discussion took an unusual turn When it was pointed out that a new society had been formed whose mandate it was to combat this dangerous trend toward blissful, socially concerned mediocrity. The "Socially Obnoxious and Boorish Society" or S.O.B. society's mandate is the preservation of insensitivity.
On further investigation I was able to speak with Mr. I.M Anass, the president of the society. He explained that members are encouraged to be pushy and rude, they seek out a variety of ways to vent their spleens. With uncommon graciousness he passed along a list of suggestions for potential members to explore. "If followed to their fullest, these ideas will give the interested party a feel for whether or not they wish to pursue membership".
The list of suggestions include:
1. Leave toilet seats up
2. Develop the art of foul language.
3. Use your neighbours yard as a dump for your leaves.
4. Sneer at people.
5. Borrow a VCR tape and record over it.
6. Whine
7. Snoop.
8. Talk with food in your mouth.
9. Take credit for other people's ideas.
10. Go down the up escalator.
11. Press all the buttons on the elevator.
12. Give out unlisted phone numbers.
13. Make babies cry with scary faces.
These
are indeed excellent suggestions for anyone wishing to support the
fine work of the S.O.B.
Society.
Challenging and perhaps a bit risky, they offer to add colour and
excitement into the lives of those willing to assist in the process
of Insensitivity Preservation. There is hope that the world as we
know it, will not be reduced to "a uniform shade of boring
beige". Excuse me I need to go test the toilet seat…..
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