Many
people, primarily women, have commented how the sexes bear up so
differently when they are ill. Most comments are directed at the
notion that men are wimps compared to their female counterparts when
illness strikes. I would like to shed some light on this myth
although there are some who would call me biased simply because I am
male.
It
has been a staple of the complaint that men are said to whine when
they are ill while women endure. In rebuttal to this most twisted
point of view I argue that men are simply more honest about the pains
they feel. Simple statements such as my hair hurts..... I think there
is something growing inside my eyeball or I don't think there's
anything left to throw up are no more than bits of information we
hunter-gather types rely to those who rely on us for roots and fresh
meat. Personally I would think a partner would be more concerned when
some mutated virus takes me to deaths door.
Women
become just as sick as do their menfolk. They pride themselves in a
stoic ability to endure whatever nature throws at them without
complaint. I view this as a basic dishonesty on their part. I mean
how am I to know she's not in the mood if have no idea she's ill.
This denial leads to a degree of truly bizarre circumstances with
some women walking barefoot in the snow to thank a neighbour for a
kind word shared last August. I personally feel this dysfunctional
behaviour makes about as much sense as a haemophiliac exploring
masochism as a new hobby.
Another
difference that makes little sense is a woman's tendency to keep an
affliction secret. There are times when I thought all was well until
I heard my partner retching in the toilet at three in the morning. My
query of "Why didn't you tell me?", was not politely
answered and the retching continued long after I had gone back to bed
and fallen asleep. Stoicism is hardly attractive as I stare into
puffy teary eyes and my partner barks "I'm just fine!!!".
Personally
I find the males play by play account of what is happening to his
body a much simpler, straightforward way of dealing with illness.
Objective statements such as 'I'm going to throw up'.....or 'Can you
get me some clean underwear? I don't think I'm going to make
it'......or 'I just blew my nose. Does this colour look right to
you?', simply inform our partners about the particular situation we
are experiencing at the moment.
Another
area where men seem to be light years ahead of women is in their
ability to recover speedily. Give me a couple of days and everything
is back in order. Women seem to require a rather lengthy
convalescence. My partner had a headache every night for two months
even after a rather nasty bout with the flu whereas my recovery from
the same malady took only a week.As in all areas of life there is
value in compromise. No degree of distance is impossible to overcome
if one is willing to meet the other half way. Recently I came down
with a killer cold and knowing my regular routine when ill I said
instead that I'd "take it like a woman". A smile appeared
on my partners face and the headache that had dogged her for two
months disappeared shortly thereafter.
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