In
this new age there is an overwhelming encouragement to have us
connect with our inner selves... to get in touch with our feelings...
to become whole persons. The myriad of paths to reach this oneness
with ourselves is confusing to say the least. One is asked to choose
between Transcendental Meditation and Tai Chi... channelling and
horoscopes.... Prozac or bourbon.
Therapy
is an avenue in the exploration of self that is gaining more and more
acceptance. No longer are labels of lunatic attached to those seeking
to find inner harmony. One of the more popular ideas in this quest
for inner peace is the reconciliation of the 'inner child' with the
'outer adult'. The concept of resolving childhood issues by
'adopting' oneself is very popular and has demonstrated surprising
success with therapists the world over.
For
the lay person this might all seem like more psychobabble but a quick
self test that follows is an accurate indicator of the state of
happiness of the 'Inner Child".
Score
1 point if the situation described never occurs.
Score
2 points if it occurs occasionally.
Score
3 points if the mode of behaviour is as common as breathing.
Your
inner child...
_
1. has been sulking since you didn't buy a pony for Christmas.
_
2. hasn't played with the inner teddy bear in days.
_
3. spends a long time isolating in your colon.
_
4. joins an inner gang and kicks the life out of your liver.
_
5. calls you a 'pathetic, co-dependent a—hole' when you offer them
a warm, loving hug.
_
6. has a habit of whacking the hell out of the inner puppy were given
for their birthday.
You
find yourself......
_
7. no longer able laugh and giggle when the elevator goes down at
work.
_
8. thinking about doing yourself in with an overdose of espresso
and M&M's.
_
9. sticking out your tongue at your boss when he points out an error
you made.
_
10. fighting the urge to throw your morning espresso and yoghurt to
the floor.
_
11. hearing your inner child say they can hardly wait until they're
18 to get out of this 'dump'.
_
12. receiving a summons from an inner lawyer about a $50 million
inner lawsuit.
Scoring
Explanation
12-20
- your inner child is quite content to have you care for them or
perhaps your inner child is simply a panty waste dweeb who hasn't got
enough nerve to speak up about the abuse you have put them through.
21-28
- this score indicates a borderline dissatisfaction between the outer
adult and the messages generated by the inner child. It could also be
possible that the manipulative brat is simply playing with your head
to squeeze every last ounce of life from you.
29-36
- scoring this area indicates a real need for some professional help
in dealing with unresolved issues. Expect this process to take up to
a decade of intensive therapy and a financial drain that will
necessitate a second mortgage. If this is not acceptable at this time
do worry as this type of inner child usually does well in law,
politics and organised crime, ensuring enough money for lengthy
therapy in the future
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